Massive free Articulation

The title looks like it should be on a ‘Word of the day’ calendar. “And today, our focus is on how to keep ourselves going!” So much of our lives right now must focus on what exactly it takes to survive, what we need to have, and what can we go without. This sustained ‘fight, flight, or numb’ state is causing us to reevaluate often even throughout a single day.

National Guard helps deal with food shortages in Indiana. Click here to read the article.

For some, it’s all about food. Weeks ago, I would overhear people talking about how much food they had in their pantry, how long they thought they could go without grocery shopping. I have never been more grateful for my giant freezer taking up a wall of my garage as though it were a workbench. Sure, we still need to find fresh produce and replace what we run out of, but if even the stores closed down, we would survive for quite a while.

For others, the concern was making sure their comforts were met. Paper products (something that everyone uses but most of us could live without) flew off the shelves and were impossible to find. Videogame and book sales spiked as people looked at the possibility of entertaining themselves for long periods. Webcams and microphones were on back-order.

Some thought they would use this time to nest and catch up on the projects they hadn’t had time to do. Hardware stores were crowded and paint stores could hardly mix fast enough. If they couldn’t go anywhere, people decided to make their home the perfection they saw in their mind, one afternoon at a time. I admit, I took this approach to a degree, but in my defense, I had planned for a spring break of a week before it became spring-break-for-an-indeterminate-amount-of-time.

Some didn’t have any of these options. Some were caught unawares and weren’t even home when everything started. I have a friend who hopes to finally go home to her four children Saturday, two weeks after she and her husband returned from a business trip to find the world had changed. Some don’t have the income to stock up on food or paper products, and I feel their fear every time I think for a few minutes.

Photo by Kaboompics .com on Pexels.com

I had a short-term plan, as I said, to work on a few projects that would cascade to other projects. I was going to try to get as far as I could before I ran out of spring break. I had a plan to finally read a few books, something I haven’t felt the luxury to do for a few years (Becoming by Michelle Obama was finally available on Great Lakes Digital Library, so it seemed meant). With the girls both in school for a good portion of the day, I would be able to spend some time on upcoming classwork, some time on my projects, and some time to myself.

That, of course, quickly changed. By the end of that spring break week, I knew that I was going to be teaching online instead of in a classroom. By the end of the week after that, I knew that my children would be home with me most of the time for the foreseeable future. Also by the end of the second week, I knew that my husband’s work was staying open, but that they were willing to be flexible to accommodate childcare.

As I mentioned above, I wasn’t worried about food, and we had a good stock of paper products to hold us over (still going!). My short-term plans were lengthened and revised to include entertainment, education, and refereeing for the ballerina-princess-ninja-super-heroes. We are beyond lucky to be of a demographic that has electronic devices and educational games.

Now we’ve been at this thing for a while, and while the plans keep changing, the way they change is to lengthen the time we’re all still here. Planning is vague, and any dates that are put forth have the potential of changing. We’re all in a constant state of waiting.

So what are we actually doing while we’re waiting? Yes, we’re eating and using paper products and nesting, but how are we actually using this time at home? We’re not working our day jobs (many of us aren’t anyway). We’re not going to the gym. We’re home to flatten the curve and save our families, neighbors, and friends.

That alone is huge, yet I feel like we can be home for something more, as well. While we’re home saving our society, we can be home for other important reasons, too. We can be home to find ourselves again. We can find our sustenance.

What path have you chosen? Where did it split? Where could it merge? Photo by Pixabay on Pexels.com

Some folks are lucky that what creates income also sustains their spirit, and that is beautiful. Some of us have jobs that are fulfilling and lovely, too, but we have something else pulling us in a different direction. The directions may all be ‘up’, but a different path. I don’t feel that I’ve strayed from a path so much as explored a different fork and am now looking for a way to merge back toward where I was.

I’m looking for what used to sustain me and could sustain me again. Being lucky enough that the rest of my sustenance is taken care of, I’m looking to find out what I have been missing. What has my soul been starving for that I didn’t notice?

Here I am, writing once again, seeking sustenance in a creative outlet. I might veer from this path often, but I always end up back here, trying to merge paths, no matter how much traffic swirls around me. If I can find a path that will carry me a little further than I made it last time, maybe it will be the path I stay on. Maybe the traffic won’t crowd me off this road where I struggle to stay on track. Maybe I can finally find out where it will lead.

So my challenge to you is to find your own sustenance-not the physical stuff that we’re all taking care of every day, but the needs that you have forgotten about. The ones that have been screaming to be met for years, but were drowned out by the traffic on the path that you chose to take. It might be worth merging when your ‘real-life’ picks back up.

Life will not go back to ‘normal’ when this is over, anyway. Let’s try to build a better normal as we explore the new world we’ll build.