Full disclosure: I am NOT a planner. At all. I have been forced into this role because I’m a mom. If no one plans anything, nothing happens.
Okay, so everyone has SOME plans. Photo by Bich Tran on Pexels.com
So why is it so dang hard to NOT have any plans? To feel so – suspended?
Again, I should probably qualify that. I have plans for what I’m posting in my online classes and I have plans for what food I want us to eat up. I have plans for the things without which my entire family would crumble into a hungry pile of toys in the middle of the living room if there wasn’t a plan for it.
But it is certainly throwing me off to unexpectedly not have the schedule that we’d kept up since January. I was thinking I’d have one week of spring break, then a couple weeks later, the girls’ spring break. After those short breaks, however, we’d be right back to the busy life of a family of four. I was looking forward to those breaks, but thinking I would still be stressed enough afterwards that I would be counting the weeks to June 2nd.
I am the home-est of homebodies. My ideal would be at least a week’s vacation each month. Three weeks on and one week off is reasonable, right? I was excited that one of my two classes this semester was scheduled online. Sure, it’s a lot more prep work, but it’s prep work I can do sitting on my couch.
And yes, I am so thrilled to be able to spend time with my kids and husband, doing the ‘together’ things that we haven’t been able to with school and work going. Of course I’m knitting like crazy and might actually catch up on the projects that I’ve been wanting to finish since last summer.
Thank you to all of the essential workers who are making sure that society is safe and functioning! Photo by Pixabay on Pexels.com
And I certainly understand that I am lucky that I don’t have to make plans. I know many families that are keeping their schedule basically the same, with the difference that kids need to find a family member or close friend to stay with so the parents can still go to work. Essential workers don’t have the luxury of staying home. Or, society doesn’t have the luxury of letting essential workers stay home. (We are incredibly lucky to have those essential workers and we certainly need to appreciate them more than just saying ‘thank you’ on social media a hundred times a day. Like, appreciate them monetarily and give them benefits. /rant)
For the rest of us, though we’re suspended in mid-jump, not sure when we’ll land. Just having our expectations disrupted is disorienting; we were used to how our lives ran. Some among us celebrate changes and some can’t think about changing a routine without getting dizzy, but most of us are somewhere in between. We understand the principle of ‘life is change,’ but we have daily exercise routines and weekly swim lessons.
When we’re out of those routines, we’re likely going to feel lost or like we should be doing something. I know I’m not the only one who has felt guilty about staying sick at home because people are counting on me to be at work. This is like one long sick day (or trying-not-to-get-sick-day, I suppose) and we’re all feeling like people are relying on us to DO something, but we can’t.
What we CAN do is find ways to keep up from home. I’m still working, although from a distance. We’re working on schedule/routine surrounding the new model of school that the girls are doing, but we also want to make sure we still get outside when we can. We want to enjoy the sunshine not just from our couch next to the sliding glass door.
Not Kayla’s planner, but inspiring, anyway! Photo by Bich Tran on Pexels.com
If not having a schedule is giving you hives, then make a schedule (especially if you have a snazzy planner that you made like my sister-in-law)! If that is how you and your family function, then find activities that everyone can do and stick with it. It will certainly help everyone feel normal even if there isn’t any ‘normal’ to be had. Daily yoga should not be dropped, maybe just adjusted to fit the space between the TV and the coffee table. You can’t bring the kids to play on the playground, but most parks have lawn space that would be perfect for a game of tag or catch. It’s not silly to keep to a schedule through all of this if it helps keep your family happy and safe.
All this said, I’m two and a half weeks from the end of the school semester and SO ready for the real summer season to begin. Maybe then I can let go of the feeling that I should be doing something.
Stay safe, stay well, everyone!
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